Well, I'm tired. It's the 19th day of the new year and I'm so tired. I'm tired of drama. I'm tired of people creating drama. I'm tired of people pulling me in their self-created pool of drama. I'm tired of feeling dramatic.
Hey, I'm tired of feeling so guilty for making people mad at stuff I don't think I directly caused. I'm tired of staying up at night thinking that people are mad, at me, for stuff.
I'm tired of people hiding stuff from me, stuff that I know I'll be mad about.
About Me
- Kyle Mendoza
- I hope to live life, soul search and find bliss. I seek to get lost and be found again. and again. And to eventually fall in love.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Grateful and Expectant
2012 was one of the most challenging years I had to face, if not the toughest. In 2012, I lost so much of myself that I didn't know whether I was still me or if I was already living a life which someone else wanted me to live. I spent days and nights crying my eyes out trying to convince myself to say though my hand was already on the door. There were so many heartbreaking events which did not only break my heart but crushed my being as well. I was having so many crises and breakdowns they've become past times and parts of the routines.
Although of course, it wasn't all bad. In 2012, I graduated, even if it wasn't with flying colors, what mattered to me was that I graduated on time when I thought I wouldn't. Also, in the same year, I got accepted in DLSU's college of Law. That was one of my biggest achievements this year. Friendships were rebuilt in 2012 too, not that they were broken or anything, just set aside. I am more than thankful that I was able to patch it up with the people I cared most about in college. In line with those good stuff are being able to survive two horrific terms in law school. It wasn't easy, I'm not sure if it's actually worth it, but I did get through it. And lastly, I was able to start a lifestyle, a lifestyle of healthier choices and more activity.
It was also a year of ticking of things from the bucket list. And memorable first. :)
In 2013, I'm expecting greater adventures and better management of emotions and time. I expect better and wider choices and better made judgements. I expect new experiences and learning that go with them. I hope to make the most out of this year. To get out more. To meet more people. To see more places and to fall in deep love with my First Love and with the things I do. :)
I will own this year!
Although of course, it wasn't all bad. In 2012, I graduated, even if it wasn't with flying colors, what mattered to me was that I graduated on time when I thought I wouldn't. Also, in the same year, I got accepted in DLSU's college of Law. That was one of my biggest achievements this year. Friendships were rebuilt in 2012 too, not that they were broken or anything, just set aside. I am more than thankful that I was able to patch it up with the people I cared most about in college. In line with those good stuff are being able to survive two horrific terms in law school. It wasn't easy, I'm not sure if it's actually worth it, but I did get through it. And lastly, I was able to start a lifestyle, a lifestyle of healthier choices and more activity.
It was also a year of ticking of things from the bucket list. And memorable first. :)
In 2013, I'm expecting greater adventures and better management of emotions and time. I expect better and wider choices and better made judgements. I expect new experiences and learning that go with them. I hope to make the most out of this year. To get out more. To meet more people. To see more places and to fall in deep love with my First Love and with the things I do. :)
I will own this year!
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