About Me

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I hope to live life, soul search and find bliss. I seek to get lost and be found again. and again. And to eventually fall in love.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Another Open Letter

To the person who recently hurt me.

Hello there dear. I just wanted you to know that you hurt my feelings. You made my worry for days. I did not hear from you and I thought that there was something wrong. I didn't know if it was something I did or something I said. You left me hanging. If you must know, you made me cry. You made me cry because I thought I lost you already. That I lost you to a wrong thing I did or said. And actually, I was already trying to cope. I was holding up bad but at least I was holding up.

And then today, you decide to communicate with me again. You apologize for not texting because you felt dismayed for not winning the championship. Here's the thing, that's an apology for not texting. How about an apology for actually hurting my feelings? For making look foolish, texting you all those apologies, desperately wanting to know what went wrong, what I did so grave that made you want to leave. I felt so helpless, so desperate, so pathetic.

And now you're doing it again, you're making me wait on you and honestly? I'm starting to not want to. I'm at that point that I'm too hurt to even care if tonight you'd decide to be a part of my day. It's like I'm always guessing with you and the uncertainty is killing me and I don't know how much more I can handle.

I can't do this anymore. You can't be a dormer or a bed spacer in my life. You can't just come home whenever you want to because things don't work that way with people's hearts, you know? You're hurting me and it's like you don't even care. I don't deserve this.

So please, take me as I am or take nothing at all. If you're only going halfway, then it's not worth the fall. Decide if you're in this with me, if not just let me be, cause I don't half of your heart, filled with uncertainty.

..my name is Kelsey but I call my self, Stargirl..

♥ I would like to be the air that inhabits you for a moment only. I would like to be that unnoticed and that necessary ♥


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