around 4 years ago, I met a guy who I never thought I'd give my life to.. seriously, seeing him and knowing my standards.. never did I think that I would fall so hard for him.. I met him at the church I was newly attending that time.. he was my friend's friend and the first conversation we had was a joke I wanted to share and his impression of me that he wanted to share.. I don't really remember how we became close.. but I know that that was where it all started..
we started texting and hanging out after that.. we hung out a lot.. at church.. after church.. outside church.. at his school.. at the park.. at my friends house.. ok.. you get it.. and little by little his annoying-ness became more and more bearable and his company became more and more enjoyable..
January 2008.. that was the time I knew that I was starting to like him.. he was flirty.. and I had the idea that I wasn't the only girl he was sweet to.. but we spent a lot of time together.. and to me, that was all that mattered.. summer 2008, he asked me to do him a favor.. since I was out of school and I had a lot of time to spare, I agreed to his favor.. and that favor involved a lot of time together.. he went to my house almost everyday.. and of course, you would know what would come after that..
August 16, 2008.. I finally admitted to myself that I was starting to fall in love with him.. every aspect of him suddenly became so likable.. from his messy hair to his rugged look to his husky voice and his flirty personality.. suddenly I liked talking to him on the phone.. suddenly I wanted to see him everyday.. how did I realize these feelings? It was my 16th birthday celebration.. and I felt jealous of a girl he paid more attention to than me.. then it hit me.. I was indeed slowly but surely falling for this guy..
August 19, 2008.. Our first kiss.. and it was the best thing that happened between the two of us.. we had shared something so special.. I knew I wanted him.. and I wanted him to know that too.. I couldn't even take the smile of my face that night.. I will always remember that feeling I felt.. I will always remember everything about that night..
October 2008.. He finally said he loved me.. and he wasn't sure of whatever may happen but what he knew was the "now". that he loved me.. and we'll figure things out.. but we'll start slowly.. and we'll make people know.. soon..
January 2009.. we got d.a.-ed.. and it was the hardest thing we had to go through.. and the hardest times of our relationship..
Summer 2009.. Was the most painful of the six months.. we were so far away from each other.. and we couldnt even talk.. and we didn't know what was happening with each other.. so we decided to just screw the rest of the world and talk.. we talked almost everyday.. till the sun rose.. we talked about how our days were going.. we talked about how we missed each other.. how much we loved each other.. and that we have a few more months left till everything can be back to normal again..
August 19, 2009.. Happy Anniversary :') i didn't think we'd last a year long but we did.. :') and we took our relationship up a notch.. to a whole new level.. and that's something i will never regret.. :')
December 19, 2009.. Our first break up.. I wanted you to focus on ministry.. It broke my heart to have to spend christmas like that..
January 2010.. we got back together :') I was so happy..
May 2010.. I came back from Palawan.. and that whole summer, all we did was fight.. we fought until we got tired of fighting.. I found out about you and her.. it broke my heart even more..
June 6 2010.. Half my heart died.. I could not even grasp the reality that it was all over.. I died everyday.. each part of my body aching in response of what my heart was feeling.. I cried every night after that night.. I cried until I could not cry anymore.. I cried until my tears dried up.. I cried until I fell asleep at night.. I thought it would never end..
December 2010.. The last goodbye..
If you're wondering what ever happened between me and him? Well, we're friends.. or at least were casual.. he's happy with someone else.. and I'm happy with what I got.. I don't regret anything and everything.. never will I.. he was and will always be someone that contributed so much to my life.. he will always be that man who stole my heart.. he will always be that man who taught me how to love.. and love for real.. he will always be that man who taught me that love is about giving.. and knowing what will make that person happy.. and giving that to him, even though it will break your heart.. he will always be the man who made me realize the things I want in life.. he will always be a part of who I am.. like a scar.. a healed wound.. but left a mark to remind me the lessons I will always hold on to..
Joshua.. those were 2 beautiful years.. I have never and will never ever forget all of the things we shared.. :') though I'd like to hate you.. at the end of the day I don't.. because though I am not in love with you anymore.. I still love you.. :') always have.. and always will..
(ky)
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