What I hate about missing you

So, I'm not actually sure if you can lose something you never had but what I'm sure about is that you can and will feel the sense of loss. It's like wanting this really nice pair of shoes and when you finally have the money for it, you find out that your size is already out of stock. You never had the shoe but you were so close to having it and somehow, you feel like you lost it.

I guess I feel the same about a certain someone.

Sometime ago, I fell in love with a guy who was totally out of my league. I thought it was possible, I thought it would work but with the tone of my sentences, you know how it all went down.

And I miss him every second since then. And everything just finds its way to remind me of him. A word, a taste, a place, a song, a shirt... you get what I mean.. Sometimes, I'd find myself smiling at the thought of him or the things he'd say or the things that we used to do.. But sometimes, when I do remember all of these memories and moments, I just find myself quiet.. thinking of the things that I could've done differently which might have made him stay.. But I guess this is life for us.. We think of the possibilities, we regret what has already happened and we mourn the loss of them.. But we cannot mull over all of these things forever.. There will come a time that we just have to stick to the smiles and tap our own shoulders and remind ourselves that we have to move on.. Life is too beautiful to wallow over sad things..

I guess the thing about missing you though is, I feel like I don't even have the right to.